Then and Now

I recently found an old photo of my husband and I right after we started dating. When I look at the image of myself I see someone so young and free from the burdens and worries of life. I was 26 so I suppose I must have had some burdens and worries, but I can’t remember what they were. I may have worried about stuff like boyfriends and break ups. There might have been some trouble coming up with enough for rent at times, but certainly nothing major had gone wrong in my life to that point.

Now about 20 years on I have learned some important lessons about how the universe works. Although my troubles don’t seem so bad compared to many others, they were mine and I felt them each acutely.  When I look at that picture of myself so young, fresh and full of possibilities I feel a little sad.  Just a little. It’s true that I had a lot to learn, and some real heart breaks coming my way.  I suppose that it's good we don’t know about that ahead of time because we might just give up. Life is good, and I know now that is true partly because of the hard stuff that we have to go through which changes us in some important ways. When you look at your children do you regret knowing about all the ways the world is going to hurt them?